Sex Talk: Week 3

Devotional

Have you ever thought about how sex obsessed our culture really is? It’s in movies, tv shows, on tik tok, instagram, your friends talk about it at school, it’s in the books we read, and the video games we play. If you think about the music we listen to it’s even worse. Every rap song is about sex or drugs or both. Then you have country music or pop music which are just as bad. Then of course there’s pornography. Statistics show 6 out of every 10 Americans have watched porn in their life. They don’t even realize the damage it’s causing them. Sex is everywhere we turn.

It’s all over the church too! On one hand you have churches that are terrified to talk about it. They are so worried about what to say they avoid it all together. They never share what the Bible has to say on sex. On the other hand you have the churches that talk about it way too often. They are convinced the best way to protect everyone from sexual sin is to never stop talking about it.

We have all got it so messed up. We have created this idol out of sex and we expect it to fulfill all our needs. We let lust drive us and hope it will fulfill us.

Here’s the problem. It never will. Sex will never fully satisfy you. Yeah you might have a little fun and feel good for a while, but what always happens? You are always left wanting more.

It’s like a drug. If you look at addictive drugs, it’s never enough to just do it once. You come down from the high and you start craving it again. But this time you need more to reach the same high. So you keep coming back for more. One more hit, one more drink, whatever it is. Just one more. But it’s very rarely “just one more” right? Cause they always start craving the next high, thinking “This one will satisfy me” but it doesn’t.

Sex is the same way. It will always leave you wanting more. That’s why people have pornography addictions. It’s pretty rare to watch something like that once and just be done with it. Your mind will always want more. The more you go back to it the more you want it and the worse the addiction becomes. It is never enough for you. And when the high wears off you will feel just as empty as you did before.

There’s a woman in the bible who seems to look for sex to fulfill her. Jesus meets her at a well in the town of Samaria. Long story short, Jesus asks this woman for water and she’s like you don’t have a cup, then He is like ok ask me for water instead, and she is like ”Ok weirdo you still don’t have anything to get the water.” (I am paraphrasing of course) But then Jesus starts talking about this living water that if you drink it you will never be thirsty again. Look what he says. John 4:13-15 says,

"Jesus answered, “Everyone who drinks this water will be thirsty again, but whoever drinks the water I give them will never thirst. Indeed, the water I give them will become in them a spring of water welling up to eternal life.” The woman said to him, “Sir, give me this water so that I won’t get thirsty and have to keep coming here to draw water.”

So she’s like yeah I would like to be done coming to this well everyday give me that water. Then Jesus does something weird, look at his response. 16-18 says,

"He told her, “Go, call your husband and come back.” “I have no husband,” she replied.Jesus said to her, “You are right when you say you have no husband. The fact is, you have had five husbands, and the man you now have is not your husband. What you have just said is quite true.”

So this woman has been through 5 marriages and is now living with a man she isn’t married to. Now we don’t know the full story here. We don’t know why she has had 5 husbands or what happened to bring her to that point but what’s obvious is this woman was looking for something in these men that she was never going to find. They were probably looking for the same thing in her and they were all disappointed every single time.

They were looking for a person to fill the void. Whether it was through relationship, or sex or whatever else, they were hoping this other person would satisfy some need they had. But obviously it wasn’t working. Jesus knows this. He knows this woman’s story and how desperate she is for something to fill the hole in her heart.

And He knows another relationship isn’t going to do that for her. That’s why he offers her the living water. See when Jesus is talking about living water he isn’t talking about actual water he is talking about himself. Jesus is saying I can give you something that will fulfill your needs and give you eternal life. And He offers the same thing to every single one of us.

A relationship with Jesus is the only thing that will ever fulfill you. When we truly love Jesus and follow Him, that is where we find fulfillment and satisfaction, not in sex or popularity or anything else the world says will satisfy. We find it in Jesus.

My favorite part of this story is the fact that Jesus knew this woman’s story and he didn’t shame her. He didn’t look down on her or judge her. He just offered her a better way of doing life. It’s the same for us and for our friends caught up in sexual sin. God is not looking at you with anger and judgement in his eyes. He loves each one of us and has so much grace for us and the stupid things we get involved in. But He also knows those things are never going to bring us true joy. Just like Jesus at the well He is looking at me and you and all the people in our lives and He is offering us living water. A relationship with Him and a better way to live. Question is. Will we take it?

Break the ice

If you could only eat one thing for the rest of your life what would it be?

Small group questions

1. How often would you say sex is talked about at school or amongst your friends?
2. Why do you think our society talks about sex and sexuality so often?
3. How do you think that has impacted you and your generation? Are there pros and cons?
4. We have talked about this a little bit before, but why does God care about sexual sin? Why does it matter to Him?
5. Let’s read John 4:7-28. What sticks out to you in this story?

1. What does Jesus mean when he is talking about living water?
2. Take out your phones and look up “What does the Bible say about living water?” Let’s see what verses we can find.

- *group leader note* Spend some time looking this up ahead of time to see the verses you might come across. Be prepared to help the students study the verses and the context around them and figure out what they mean,

8. What are some things you have been doing to find fulfillment outside of Jesus? Has it been working?

Moving forward

When Jesus offers us living water He is offering us a better life. He is offering an eternal relationship with Him and “life to the full” where we don’t have to look to sex or anything else to satisfy us. You just have to take him up on that offer and let Him have control in your life. If you haven’t made that commitment and want to talk about it, let’s talk right after group. For those of you who are already following Christ but you are still struggling trying to find fulfillment in other things. Let’s take some time to pray for each other and help each other out. *Split up the group into small groups of 3* Every group go ahead and share with each other the thing you keep hoping will satisfy you, whether it’s drugs, sex, gossip, popularity, friendships, anything outside of Jesus. Once everyone has shared, take some time to pray over each other and make a commitment to text each other twice this week to remind each other to focus on Jesus.