Scripture
1The king’s heart is like a stream of water directed by the Lord;
he guides it wherever he pleases.
2People may be right in their own eyes,
but the Lord examines their heart.
3The Lord is more pleased when we do what is right and just
than when we offer him sacrifices.
4Haughty eyes, a proud heart,
and evil actions are all sin.
5Good planning and hard work lead to prosperity,
but hasty shortcuts lead to poverty.
6Wealth created by a lying tongue
is a vanishing mist and a deadly trap.[1]
7The violence of the wicked sweeps them away,
because they refuse to do what is just.
8The guilty walk a crooked path;
the innocent travel a straight road.
9It’s better to live alone in the corner of an attic
than with a quarrelsome wife in a lovely home.
10Evil people desire evil;
their neighbors get no mercy from them.
11If you punish a mocker, the simpleminded become wise;
if you instruct the wise, they will be all the wiser.
12The Righteous One[2] knows what is going on in the homes of the wicked;
he will bring disaster on them.
13Those who shut their ears to the cries of the poor
will be ignored in their own time of need.
14A secret gift calms anger;
a bribe under the table pacifies fury.
15Justice is a joy to the godly,
but it terrifies evildoers.
16The person who strays from common sense
will end up in the company of the dead.
17Those who love pleasure become poor;
those who love wine and luxury will never be rich.
18The wicked are punished in place of the godly,
and traitors in place of the honest.
19It’s better to live alone in the desert
than with a quarrelsome, complaining wife.
20The wise have wealth and luxury,
but fools spend whatever they get.
21Whoever pursues righteousness and unfailing love
will find life, righteousness, and honor.
22The wise conquer the city of the strong
and level the fortress in which they trust.
23Watch your tongue and keep your mouth shut,
and you will stay out of trouble.
24Mockers are proud and haughty;
they act with boundless arrogance.
25Despite their desires, the lazy will come to ruin,
for their hands refuse to work.
26Some people are always greedy for more,
but the godly love to give!
27The sacrifice of an evil person is detestable,
especially when it is offered with wrong motives.
28A false witness will be cut off,
but a credible witness will be allowed to speak.
29The wicked bluff their way through,
but the virtuous think before they act.
30No human wisdom or understanding or plan
can stand against the Lord.
31The horse is prepared for the day of battle,
but the victory belongs to the Lord.
Translation notes (2)
- 21:6 As in Greek version; Hebrew reads mist for those who seek death.
- 21:12 Or The righteous man.
9It’s better to live alone in the corner of an attic
than with a quarrelsome wife in a lovely home.
Do you know someone who argues a lot? These are people who fight and argue at every corner. It can be frustrating, can't it? Or are you constantly arguing, always looking for a reason to start a fight? Arguing, or quarreling, changes the atmosphere. It creates a climate for more frustration and arguing instead of strengthening relationships.
The book of Proverbs warns about being people who are constantly quarreling with others and spending time with people who are constantly quarreling. Proverbs 21:9 says, "It's better to live alone in the corner of an attic than with a quarrelsome wife in a lovely home" (verse 9). In other words, quarreling only tears down a household. It weakens the relationship, sometimes in a way that is very difficult to repair. In other words, words are powerful. Proverbs 18:21 says, "The tongue can bring death or life." In light of our words' power, it stands to reason that we take the words we say seriously and offer encouragement and life with our words, especially in our most important relationships, including with our spouse.
Cooks Hill Counseling's website teaches that one way we can think about using our words wisely is to use the acronym "THINK." Are our words true, helpful, inspiring, necessary, and kind? This acronym calls us to speak the truth and be trustworthy with our word. It encourages us to make sure that our words are helpful, offering advice and encouragement to the people around us. It calls us to use our words in an inspiring way and make people want to live better lives and honor God. It reminds us to make sure our words are necessary and have a purpose for being spoken. Finally, this acronym calls us to let kindness be the lens for our words. When we use this acronym, we can be purposeful and intentional with the words we say each day. After all, they are powerful.
We know from Scripture the importance of speaking wisely and encouraging each other. The question is, how will we use them? Will we build our relationships up, or will we tear them down by the words we say? Let's use our words to bring life. How will you encourage the people around you with your words today?
Moving toward action
Take a few moments and think about how people's words have impacted you, for better or worse. If you would like, write about these moments in your journal. Next, think about how you can encourage others. If you are married, let this person be your spouse. If you are single, think of someone in your life who you know needs encouragement. Make a plan for encouraging and building these people up with your words and actions today.
Going Deeper
Proverbs 21:1-31 (NLT)
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